Hi guys. I’ve been more productive lately. My psychiatrist says it’s because I was on such a high dose of kratom, and it takes a while after stopping for the brain to re-equilibrate. Anyway I’m not sure if I believe it’s entirely the cause of my psychiatric condition(s), but I do believe it played a part. There’s trace psychosis (paranoia every now and then, hearing my family’s thoughts correlated with panic), generalized anxiety (restless, can’t settle down, hard to focus, pacing around a lot), and social anxiety (self-explanatory), but it’s all gotten better. I’ve been on this psych med for I don’t know how long, like a year now, but the dose was increased to what it’s at only maybe half a year to a few months ago. (I hope my psychiatrist keeps better track of these things than I do!–he should, given he works for Kaiser). Where was I… what was I going to say… I guess the point is I’m being more productive and focused. Still not the good ol’ college days (I was an academic and lifestyle beast), but who knows where it will go someday.
Today, I uploaded photographs from a hike with my family to a nearby regional trail to Google photos and shared the album with them. I also selected the artsier photos (we tried out a new telephoto lens that the Amazon dealer didn’t replace–the original was defective–until their management stepped in, which itself didn’t happen until like a year after I bought the thing because I hadn’t tried the telephoto lens until then!) to upload to our online gallery, which has a store where you can buy all neat stuff, like prints, business cards, framed art, postcards. And I uploaded them. I didn’t just select them, I also uploaded them. Yes. Ahem. And then I got inspired and took the macro lens and shot all’a bunch’a thu’ stuff around the house and in the backyard garden (I like to think of the backyard as a garden) and it all turned out really well! I uploaded some raw to our portfolio, and others I digitally touched up (increased brightness and contrast, in general, and added color warmth in some cases) and then uploaded. We must have like fifty photos on there by now! I hope we get some business ever. I have no clue how anyone finds anything on the internet with so many starving artists competing against one another, (I’m assuming) without knowledge of market principles or economics or any of that, or at least not a specialty in it. Some do, but I guess those are the successful ones. Probably takes a mix of business talent and art talent to be a successful commercialized artist.
So I uploaded photos. The digital touchups I was hoping would be more rewarding, as an activity, but it was actually fairly rote. Bleh/wah-wah. Oh well~
Then I read some computer science programming principles from this Unity textbook I got (or rather, my brother got for me, per my request, using his Amazon Prime account), in preparation/study for continuing on this computer game I’m working on with my mother. It’s a narrative story, I can’t say what it’s about because that might ruin the surprise and my anonymity, but it’s kind of more for children or the adults who are children at heart, and it will be very warming! We already have some of the story planned out, including dialogue and events and setting. I’ve decided the next step for me is to work on the conversation and narration system. That includes U.I. scripting as well as writing down the damned text into the code editor! I’m very lazy about it, but I creep up on the task every now and then. So like I said, today I read some of the programming textbook and it was a fairly abstract section about delegates, subsection of object interaction systems. Abstract, see? But I like it and I’ll probably re-read it to get a better grasp on it.
Then I visited my $100 stock portfolio on Robinhood (commission-free website, everyone! super legit! Also, if I’m not mistaken, Australian-based) and mostly I am a long investor, but I did some more research on my holdings (largely pharma, some auxiliary medical and also photovoltaics (that means solar panels / solar energy)), including reading a few articles on Seeking Alpha, which seems like a really popular investing news and analysis website… that I actually like. Not that I don’t like most. I actually prefer reading investment news to novels (which is sad but true, and I wish it weren’t so because novels can be so rewarding when you get into them). I want to buy a share of Isreali-based generics manufacturer Teva because I think generics are a good cause (who doesn’t want cheap, effective medication to treat illness!) and will be around for a while. And I can afford it, if I sell off some of my other holdings, because their stock is around 20 buck. I only have like 6 buying power now, so I sold a few things, the orders will execute tomorrow open of market, but that still will put me short. Not short as in short selling, just as in not enough cash to buy a share. So I’ll have to let go of some other things once they rebound a little. Some of my pharma stocks are down such large percentage! God, those pennies! This involved some math and a calculator. Anyway.
And of course nonstop vaping, which is a bad habit and possibly bad for my lungs as I do it incorrectly. You’re supposed to do it like a cigar–just in your mouth, then out. But it’s a leftover tendency from cigarette smoking, and it will be hard to change. To boot, when I hold in my mouth I immediately want to inhale oxygen out of nature, so I go through the nose, and some vape goes in my lungs then anyway so I don’t see how it’s any better unless I really train myself to be a pro. Like I guess mouth control or holding my breath after drawing or something like that.
So just a little life update. Ah, I miss blogging, too, can I say! How are you all doing? Been in a bit of a poetry slump lately so I apologize for that. The submissions craze is over for me–submitted to like 20 mags within the span of a month. Lots of simultaneous submissions but I’d estimate the set covered up to thirty different poems. A little higher quality stuff than what I post on here (sorry, audience!). But I’m sure I’ll get back into it and start posting on here again soon. Real sure. Yeah. Like science. Scientifically certain. (Not.)
Ending. Ending ending ending. Ending paragraph. I’m going to the gym with my brother soon and we might play cards once we get home. I drink too much coffee, but not an obsequious amount. The use of “obsequious” actually doesn’t make sense there but it sounds so good I just had to say it.
Okay that’s it for now. Thanks for listening, those of you who did. And to those who just skim/scan/skip: I don’t blame you.
Edit: I just counted and we have exactly 82 photos in our portfolio excluding those submitted to magazines (those require previously unpublished)!